"F-1 Race" - NES/Famicom

----- Introduction -----

It's always a good sign when you see HAL Laboratory as the developer on a game from the 80s or 90s. Their logo of the dog lying on the eggs if forever synonymous in my mind with the genius title that is Kirby's Adventure. If we ever get that far, though, it'll be a downright miracle.

Here is something from HAL's more meager past-- a racing game for the NES: F-1 Race.

As it turns out, it didn't even come out here. English Wikipedia has little to say about the NES version, but the Japanese Wikipedia page is a little more enlightening: Satoru Iwata makes another appearance as at least one of the programmers on the game, and it's revealed that Shigeru Miyamoto was the designer on this one as well. 

The music was composed by someone named Hideki Kanazashi, who I've never heard the name of, but he also composed the music in Mach Rider, which I have always liked (the music, anyway), as well as the Adventures of Lolo games. More importantly, apparently he is sometimes credited with the name "Zap Rodeo," which is about the most incredible thing I've ever heard in my life.

So, good team! Is it a good game?

I'm not sure if a game about a race to f one is family friendly, though.

----- Playing the Game -----

F-1 Race gives you three skill levels, so I started out with Skill Level 1, as seemed appropriate given my poor talent with racing games.

There's not much to learn here, if you know how a racing game works. Once the lights flash and you get a boop sound, you're off to the races. Up/Down shift gears from low to high on your racer, A is your gas pedal, and B is your brake.

Now the only thing you have to do is go around the track a set amount of times, under the time limit, without crashing into anyone or anything.

On second thought, maybe I shouldn't consider this as a possible career for me.

The tracks get somewhat more twisty-turny as you progress through them, and at some point you encounter the cars in front of you undergoing the great AI metamorphosis, in which they decide that changing lanes whenever they see you approaching is absolutely hilarious.

Mostly, I had trouble making turns. Turns are where F-1 racers go to die.

[Prolonged screaming]

F-1 Race is a great chance to face your inner demons when it comes to being honest to yourself. Every single time you enter a turn you're going to have to stop and ask yourself if you're going too fast. 90% of the time you're going to be inclined to tell yourself not to worry about it-- just press on, it's fine, we can brake in the turn.

And every single time you're going to be wrong.

You're going to be going 10x too fast, and it's too late to brake, and suddenly there's 4 cars in the turn with you, and then you lose control of your vehicle because of the speed and start skidding.

It's a terrifying experience.

It's going to take years of therapy before I can stop seeing this when I close my eyes.

Overall, the game's pretty predictable. Usually you have to lap the track 2-3 times, and the only threat you face is other drivers, and yourself (you're definitely your biggest threat in this game).

I went on to try Skill Level 2 and 3, and I'm not exactly sure what they change, but here's my hunch:

For one, they start you forwards on harder tracks, skipping some of the easier ones.

For two, it seems like the cars on skill levels 2 and 3 are even MORE likely to abruptly change lanes.

----- Review -----

Innovation: Yes!

Does the game show anything not yet seen on this system/ever before?

I think this is both the first 'racing' title we've seen on the Famicom, and the first use of the faux-3D effect that you'll see more often in coming Famicom games.

Spitting Rage: Not terrible

Does the game make you want to tear your own organs out of your body?

Sometimes it can be frustrating when a car changes lane at the last moment, but for the most part you'll crash on turns, and it will always be 100% your stupid fault for not slowing down. Didn't someone teach you what the brake pedal is for?

Intuitive Design: Good

How easy is it to intuitively understand the game?

Most of the game can be easily intuited. I didn't notice the gear shift for the first 20-30 seconds of play, but some quick experimenting with the controller, as well as noticing the up-down indicator on the top of the screen allows even slower players like myself to eventually realize it.

'lo! Hi! How are ya?

Satisfying Gameplay: Yes

How rewarding does playing the game feel?

I don't particularly like racing games that much, but there's definitely something exciting and fun in this game when you manage to slide between the other cars with a narrow gap on a turn, and not skid off the track or into someone else. It takes some skill to even play the game on the lowest skill level, and that makes it rewarding to succeed.

Game Depth: Ankle deep

How deep/long is the game?

It's not complicated, just drive fast. The gear shift mechanic adds the barest bit of complication, but not much.

Sound Design: Good

How's the sound?

I've been waiting this whole time to make you listen to this menu theme. The engine of your vehicle has a fun NES bass sound to it, and the cars you pass also do that nyyyyyeeeeooowww thing as you go past, which is sweet. It's also cool how if you go past slowly, the sound will be extended out. It's a nice touch.

Graphics: Good

How's it look?

This faux 3D thing is totally the future! Games will never look better than this!?

Personal Chord: Almost

Does the game have that undefinable "something" for me?

I like the music, and I like the gameplay, however I still just don't really like racing games. I think I might wear this one on a t-shirt though, but it's just because I like random Famicom games nobody played-- especially one as generically named as F-1 Race. But ultimately, I don't think it's quite fitting to my aesthetic.

Should You Play: Yes

Is there a reason to even bother with this one?

To be honest, I think this game is probably just mostly a rip-off of some arcade game. It's hard to think that there wasn't some other faux-3D racing game exactly like this at this point on other consoles. It's unique on the Famicom up to this point, though. Either way, the game holds up, is fun, and definitely worth a play overall.

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